This is a beaut machine which I bought at a Splendid Day Out…if you haven’t read the previous posts, you are in for a treat you will see where I found this marvellous contraption…..the PROFAINOMATIC!  It comes with this description:

Profainomatic: Imaginated by Verne Industries Ltd

Have you ever been in a room and accidentally overheard someone using bad language or profanity?  Even in some of the best homes in the country accidental profanity will sometimes rear its ugly head.

May we introduce the Profainomatic, a clever device developed by Verne Industries.  This small marvel is simple to operate and even easier to empty.

The eye on the front of the device uses the very latest in air spring vapour compression which teases the language out of the air.  Once captured the profanity or worse is then stored in the 2 pressurised amulinium (Author’s Note: Must be a new kind of aluminium I have never heard of?!) containment vessels at the rear of the device.  When the vessels are full, they can be emptied by one of our technicians at any time at your convenience.  A true marvel!

Here it is:


You can see the amulinium cylinder protruding at the back right, there is another one on the left.  Not showing are the lights…I didn’t need to turn it on at this moment in time as I was on my own!  The eye scans every bit of space for profanity and is very efficient at doing this.  It is a surprisingly heavy machine…no plastic was used in its primary engine!  The operation of this device is simple, even a 10-year-old can operate it (heavens, I hope not, they should not be exposed to this level of profanity) by flicking the switch on the front.  It operates silently even at full bore!

Pros: Ease of operation, economical to run, does as described and doesn’t take up a lot of space.
Cons: The advertising says and I quote “Simple to operate and even easier to empty”.  The first is true but later on, you read: “Can be emptied by one of our technicians”  I live in Australia and they are in the UK…this contraption should have had detachable cylinders!  Still, I haven’t checked with the company if they provide free package and posting.

I will give this a five out of five-star rating…but I would like to see an easier way to empty the cylinders.  We will see if they have any comments or advice to offer on this?

We have been using this device for a few weeks now and it has operated flawlessly and the cylinders appear to have plenty of room…maybe they last for one year like the battery?  As soon as people see this device it’s almost like they have forgotten to swear (This must be how the device works?) they just have a good laugh!

If you would like to see more of these wonderful contraptions, go here: Verne Industries